Relationship Stress Relief: Human Training-Talking to Mirror Neurons
Article by Angela Bussio
<pHave you ever wished there was a "human-training" course that would give you some stress relief in parenting and relationships? I may have stumbled upon such a course!My children are growing up, leaving the house- and getting married. I guess that I stand at the precipice of Grand motherhood. I actually am well prepared because of my grown children's puppies- dare I say, my "grand-puppies" who come to "grandma's house" to visit. I have gates, and toys and little beds strewn throughout the house to accommodate these visits. I care (neurotically) about these new members of our extended family becoming "responsible" members of society, so I have also taken a keen interest in dog training! I absolutely love Cesar Milan's "Dog Whisperer" series, and have subsequently purchased his, "Mastering Leadership" DVD collection. It has been fascinating to me to learn that in order to be a dog's leader, you must learn to speak to your dog's brain- and until you do- he will not follow you. I get excited as I practice these techniques and watch as these animals behavior falls into line- almost effortlessly. I have to admit that it has made me feel a sense of empowerment that , unfortunately, I have rarely really felt as a parent!What if there were some "techniques" for talking to a human's brain? There actually are some very powerful techniques for gaining influence and "rapport" with another individual. I am an NLP practitioner and am keenly aware that there certainly are ways for us to influence another's behavior through mirroring techniques and by choosing certain words that match their particular learning "style" (another upcoming blog). Although I know many of these techniques and use them regularly in my role as "coach /therapist" I will admit that many times when I switch back into the role of parent or friend, I default to some pretty ineffective powerful, habitual communication patterns!
I am a predominately auditory person, who by default, loves to talk, and probably, admittedly, talk about ! twice as much as I listen many times. I live with a social "genius" who I have come to recognize, derives much of his strength in building, saving, and repairing (mostly with his talkative wife) relationships using his gift of listening. Listening is a skill that I am intently trying to hone. In fact, it is definitely on my list as a top priority this year. I recently heard an interview with Eben Pagan, Dave Logan and Dr. Mark Goulston. --a psychiatrist who actually trains swat teams and special agents to deal with hostage situations, and who has an AMAZING book out called "Just Listen". Sounds like a title that I need!This book may be the equivalent of Cesar Milan's Dog Whisperer for humans! It is absolutely fascinating as he outlines techniques, scripts that can train anyone to learn to SPEAK to the human brains "Mirror Neurons", and give you "buy-in"! It is a sequence of knowing the right words to say, and then intently listening. I have been enthusiastically endorsing, and sharing this book with everyone I know, because almost everyone I know has trouble getting "buy-in" with someone- especially those we are closest to in our home and work environments. I am feeling a level of empowerment similar to the one I felt with my grand-puppies!In this same program, Eben and Dave introduce another man named Opher Brayer who has designed a "methodology" for connecting with others using mathematics and music! He has developed 31 formulas for "storytelling" or talking to others about your vision. This was absolutely fascinating- because it is another arena, like listening, that we all perceive as being "intuitive". He teaches that when you are talking, you can use his formulas, which are different derivations of rhythm, speed, high and low tones that also access the brain and have an emotional impact similar to music! As a natural talker , it was validating to know that talking in the right way can be as effective as listening in the right way can be.I feel like my effective communication "tool-belt" has just become "su! per char ged! Making real, lasting changes in my communication style seems possible! Are you ready to add these skills to your repertoire?
Learning to listen and improve your communication and connection skills can go a long way in helping you in your efforts to find relationship stress relief! You can find more innovative stress relief solutions by going to http://www.realstressolutions.com.
Angela Bussio is a best selling author, coach, and founder of Real Stress Solutions.com, and inbox magazine. Real Stress Solutions provides state-of-the-art stress reduction and management techniques to help people find the balance they need. She is also the innovator of upcoming online program,"Turn Stress to Success" featuring the "5 minute Stress Solution" phone APP.
About the AuthorAngela Bussio is a best selling author, coach, and founder of Real Stress Solutions.com, and inbox magazine. Real Stress Solutions provides state-of-the-art stress reduction and management techniques to help people find the balance they need. She is also the innovator of upcoming online program,"Turn Stress to Success" featuring the "5 minute Stress Solution" phone APP.
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